Clerical Error - 9 Gods to Sin Against
Happy Conclave, folks.
In honour of the advent of a new pope (fingers crossed for a good one), an impromptu Blog Bandwagon has been called. A number of blogs will be writing on Clerics and all matters clerical - keep an eye out for a roundup in the Popematic Wastelands Newsletter.
Due to an unfortunate clerical error I have written about blasphemy instead.
Background
In our Glog game set in Centerra, Quicksilver Twobells escaped his fate as a human sacrifice and carried a chip on his shoulder about organised religion thereafter. Eventually he became a dystheist, driven to undermine and eradicate organised religion wherever he found it.
To support this vendetta our GM wrote up a custom GLOG class for me to play with: The Heretic. It's cool, and works well in a polytheistic setting where there's a big roster of weird gods who can smite you with weird curses. The gimmick is that you can deliberately insult a local deity and face its curse - along with anyone else in a 20ft radius. I think it's based around some old Arnold K ideas here.
The game fizzled shortly after, but not before I drafted up a handful of religions to antagonise. The Blogclave seemed the appropriate time to go back to this, and I've fleshed out and dressed up the gods here.
Note: If you were to use the Heretic class (or one like it), a curse can be called down by blasphemy alone. The sins listed below help to round out the god, but may not have mechanical effect.
9 Gods
1. Barabolo
God of fermentation, merrymaking & winged mammals.
Sin: Food waste. Followers of Barabolo are careful not to cook more than can be eaten. Meals are padded out with unspoilable foods such as ferments brought to table.
Blessing: Rising Sun, Rising Dough - at dawn, any yeast or ferment belonging to one blessed by Barabolo will be fortified. Breads baked on such a day will take on a golden colour, beers will always froth merrily.
Curse: Insatiable hunger.
2. Swea
Swin's sister. God of ropes, knots & binding. Popular with sailors.
Sin: Broken promises, contracts and marriages. Any of the above may be unravelled with a painstaking ritual, which depends on the depth and complexity of the commitment.
Blessing: Unslippable Bonds - one blessed by Swea will be inspired in any rope-tying, and will always tie the right knot. It is rumoured that priests of Swea make hardy crochet armour under her blessing.
Curse: Muscle cramps and spasms make it difficult to move.
3. Swin
Swea’s brother. When the rivers, oceans and lakes, the clouds and the rain were distributed to the gods, Swin got whatever was left. Waterfalls, mist, seaspray, cauldrons & kettles, steam.
Sin: Failure to wash hands and face before a meal.
Blessing: Each morning, one blessed by Swin will wake with a full waterskin. The water inside is sweet.
Curse: A cloud of humid air follows the blasphemer. In certain climates, the cloud will be fog or frost, turning an inconvenient curse into a potentially deadly one.
4. Choten
God of spinning - textiles, wheeled vehicles, trade, spiders & flowers.
Sin: Obstruct a road without providing a detour.
Blessing: True Wheel - it becomes easy for one under this blessing to form and keep habits.
Curse: Disorientation - The terms "left" and "right" become meaningless, it is nearly impossible to follow directions.
5. Father Calo
God of burrows, burrowing frogs, holes, caves, anthills, springs, wells, potatoes, reed instruments and underground treasures.
Sin: Fill in a burrow or naturally formed hole.
Blessing: Blanket of Earth - always sleep peacefully if dug into a hand's depth of soil.
Curse: Holes everywhere you don't want them - your pockets, your shoes, your bathtub. Pray that's as bad as it gets.
6. Shaa
God of quelling and hushing. “Holy are the dark hours, the frost and silver linings. The diligent scribe, the sleeping babe, the nighttime thief - these are my children.”
Sin: Wake a sleeping baby.
Blessing: Quiet a row, or hush your footsteps in a darkened vault.
Curse: Noisy Body - all the quiet sounds you make are amplified. Your breath rattles, your chewing distracts your neighbours, it is impossible to discreetly pass gas.
7. Dewalda
God of spindles, needles, and of silver tongues.
Sin: Harsh words and bawdy jokes are an affront.
Blessing: Dewalda can't bestow grace, but can bestow courage - those under her blessing are free from anxiety in the lead-up to an act or event. Beloved of surgeons and soldiers. Amateur thespians worship her, but those who aspire to smutty humour must forego her blessings.
Curse: Slips of the tongue, or of the needle. Either could be painful.
8. Pica
God worshipped only by children. Worship in the upper branches of a tree you’ve climbed, or by spinning till you fall over then hanging upside down until your head turns red. Pray for candied fruit or for the haste to outrun a beating. Pray for mother to get better or for teacher to be ill today. An aspect of this god is hidden in the darkest corner of the bedroom, in the damp-smelling basement, in the forbidden back yard of the fearsome neighbour.
Sin: Attempting to worship as an adult. Striking a child.
Blessing: When shadows grow long, but before the sun dips below the horizon, there is a secret hour of the day. Pica opens this gate to children under their protection.
Curse: Something lurks and lingers, always just out of sight. Cross your fingers and don't step on the cracks.
9. Hammer Lord
God of hammers, hammering & pounding. His followers carry hammers and wield them in battle. Very straightforward - easily angered and easily fooled. Something of a joke to other gods and their followers.
Sin: Allowing a hammer to rust.
Blessing: If a nail is capable of going into a material, two solid taps will send it in.
Curse: God Sledge - when you are next at work, a giant hammer from the sky strikes, obliterating whatever you are working on.
Further Reading
If you're sick of BIG gods and you want some more small ones, check out 1d6 Small Gods. Even smaller gods? Have d100, courtesy (of course) of Ktrey. Or Dungeon Gods, which come built with boons and prayers. Or these other Six Dungeon Gods, who all have an answer to the question, "Why do people suffer?"
If you're after something a bit truer to life you should read this great series on Practical Polytheism, or go and play Runequest.
Finally, this post on curses also wouldn't be complete without me cursing myself through inviting a direct comparison with the best to ever do it. Here's Arnold K on Augury, Blasphemy and Oaths.
Conclave Compatriots
I'll try to come back and post some more links from my colleagues as they are published throughout the Conclave.
Explorers Design: What's Under the Pope's Hat? (praise the Rat Pope)
Dododecahedron: Classless Clerics
Patchwork Paladin: Trade and Be Blessed
Seed of Worlds: Insectfolk Elementalism
Rise Up Comus: Embedding Lore in Your Classes
Among Cats and Books: Kill Clerics, Become Warlocks
Personable Thoughts: A Link in the Great Chain: Clerics in the Religious Hierarchy
Magnolia Keep: The Implied Apocalypse of the Cleric
Mindstorm Press: Biblically Inaccurate Religions
Prismatic Wasteland: Divine Magic Works in Mysterious Ways
More to come!